It's bad that I didn't blog while I was actually in Nicaragua, but I did journal every day, so my thoughts throughout the experience have been recorded for me to review and digest. The two weeks spent in Nica were full of ups and downs, and it was difficult to absorb all of the information in such a short amount of time. Now that I am back, I feel more prepared to share my experiences and personal development.
Although I took the class on Nicaragua this past Spring, I learned so much more by being in the country. I knew a basic timeline of Nicaraguan history, but our lecture in Nicaragua and our interactions with actual Nicaraguan citizens taught me so much more. I had no idea how corrupt Ortega had become. Yes, it looked bad that he changed the term limits on presidency a few months ago, but from an American perspective I never had any idea of how difficult his administration has made it to vote against him. The 15 year old girl in my home-stay explained to me that although she is of age to get her identification card to vote, she knows she will not receive one for years because she does not identify with the FSLN party. Eye-opening experiences like this happened every day, which constantly made me realize how difficult it is to understand internal issues from an external perspective. I thought I knew so much about Nicaraguan and U.S. relations before I came, but in reality I was barely scratching the surface.
Working with the kids at Los Quinchos was one of the most rewarding and uplifting experiences of the trip. Whenever I felt weighed down by the corruption I was learning about, being with the girls at La Yahoska could lift that burden for a bit. These girls were so joyful, so smart, and so loving. We sewed dolls and purses together (thanks Chelsea!), and played games. I guess I had some preconceived notion that because the kids were from the street, they would be broken or something. But Laura said it best in one of our reflections when she noted how resilient children can be. I grew to appreciate Los Quinchos as an organization because it provides a space for children to mend and become the people they were meant to be. There is nothing that can compare with working directly at the sites to motivate me to continue to support it.
As far as future actions, I still feel very much conflicted. I want to support Los Quinchos. This organization does amazing work and it clearly needs funding. I do believe that the best thing a person can do to enact change is to find one cause and put 100% effort into it. I just worry that Los Quinchos isn't enough. Los Quinchos can only help so much. What happens when these kids graduate from the program? They will still be trapped in a system that is failing them. It's frustrating to think that we have the power to support children so much, but once they grow up they don't have the same resources. It's even more frustrating to think about how much the United States is involved in the structural problems of Nicaragua. Is there more we can be doing at home? Are Americans willing to give up some of their comfort (cheap coffee, produce, clothing, etc.) to benefit the poor majority in countries like Nicaragua? I worry that the answer is no, and that true change is hopeless.
I don't want to end this post on a negative note. I am so grateful that I had the opportunity to serve and learn in Nica. I wouldn't have it any other way. I see so much strength in the Nicaraguan people--they have gone through so much as a nation and yet are so full of spirit and hope. There can be a brighter future ahead, we just need to educate more people about these issues to find a solution together.
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